50 Rules for Dads of Daughters {by Michael Mitchell}

Wow  - I can't believe how much I love this :) 

50 Rules for Dads of Daughters {by Michael Mitchell}

About Michael 
Michael Mitchell is an (almost) thirty-something dad who blogs daily tips and life lessons for dads of daughters at lifetoheryears.com. He spends his days practicing the arts of fatherhood and husbandry, while attempting to be a man of God and a professional raiser of philanthropic funds. On the rare occasion he’s not tied up with the aforementioned and other pursuits of awesomeness, he enjoys fighting street gangs for local charities and drinking from a cup that’s half full. Bookmark Life To Her Years, follow Michael on Twitter, and “like” him on Facebook for more “rules”.

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1. Love her mom. Treat her mother with respect, honor, and a big heaping spoonful of public displays of affection. When she grows up, the odds are good she’ll fall in love with and marry someone who treats her much like you treated her mother. Good or bad, that’s just the way it is. I’d prefer good.

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2. Always be there. Quality time doesn’t happen without quantity time. Hang out together for no other reason than just to be in each other’s presence. Be genuinely interested in the things that interest her. She needs her dad to be involved in her life at every stage. Don’t just sit idly by while she add years to her… add life to her years.

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3. Save the day. She’ll grow up looking for a hero. It might as well be you. She’ll need you to come through for her over and over again throughout her life. Rise to the occasion. Red cape and blue tights optional.

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4. Savor every moment you have together. Today she’s crawling around the house in diapers, tomorrow you’re handing her the keys to the car, and before you know it, you’re walking her down the aisle. Some day soon, hanging out with her old man won’t be the bees knees anymore. Life happens pretty fast. You better cherish it while you can.

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5. Pray for her. Regularly. Passionately. Continually.

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6. Buy her a glove and teach her to throw a baseball. Make her proud to throw like a girl… a girl with a wicked slider.

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7. She will fight with her mother. Choose sides wisely.

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8. Go ahead. Buy her those pearls.

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9. Of course you look silly playing peek-a-boo. You should play anyway.

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10. Enjoy the wonder of bath time.

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11. There will come a day when she asks for a puppy. Don’t over think it. At least one time in her life, just say, “Yes.”

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12. It’s never too early to start teaching her about money. She will still probably suck you dry as a teenager… and on her wedding day.

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13. Make pancakes in the shape of her age for breakfast on her birthday. In a pinch, donuts with pink sprinkles and a candle will suffice.

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14. Buy her a pair of Chucks as soon as she starts walking. She won’t always want to wear matching shoes with her old man.

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Photo Credit :: Danielle Rocke Toews

15. Dance with her. Start when she’s a little girl or even when she’s a baby. Don’t wait ‘til her wedding day.

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16. Take her fishing. She will probably squirm more than the worm on your hook. That’s OK.

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17. Learn to say no. She may pitch a fit today, but someday you’ll both be glad you stuck to your guns.

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18. Tell her she’s beautiful. Say it over and over again. Someday an animated movie or “beauty” magazine will try to convince her otherwise.

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19. Teach her to change a flat. A tire without air need not be a major panic inducing event in her life. She’ll still call you crying the first time it happens.

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20. Take her camping. Immerse her in the great outdoors. Watch her eyes fill with wonder the first time she sees the beauty of wide open spaces. Leave the iPod at home.

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21. Let her hold the wheel. She will always remember when daddy let her drive.

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22. She’s as smart as any boy. Make sure she knows that.

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23. When she learns to give kisses, she will want to plant them all over your face. Encourage this practice.

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24. Knowing how to eat sunflower seeds correctly will not help her get into a good college. Teach her anyway.

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25. Letting her ride on your shoulders is pure magic. Do it now while you have a strong back and she’s still tiny.

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26. It is in her nature to make music. It’s up to you to introduce her to the joy of socks on a wooden floor.

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27. If there’s a splash park near your home, take her there often. She will be drawn to the water like a duck to a puddle.

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28. She will eagerly await your return home from work in the evenings. Don’t be late.

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29. If her mom enrolls her in swim lessons, make sure you get in the pool too. Don’t be intimidated if there are no other dads there. It’s their loss.

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30. Never miss her birthday. In ten years she won’t remember the present you gave her. She will remember if you weren’t there.

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31. Teach her to roller skate. Watch her confidence soar.

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32. Let her roll around in the grass. It’s good for her soul. It’s not bad for yours either.

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33. Take her swimsuit shopping. Don’t be afraid to veto some of her choices, but resist the urge to buy her full-body beach pajamas.

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34. Somewhere between the time she turns three and her sixth birthday, the odds are good that she will ask you to marry her. Let her down gently.

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35. She’ll probably want to crawl in bed with you after a nightmare. This is a good thing.

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36. Few things in life are more comforting to a crying little girl than her father’s hand. Never forget this.

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37. Introduce her to the swings at your local park. She’ll squeal for you to push her higher and faster. Her definition of “higher and faster” is probably not the same as yours. Keep that in mind.

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38. When she’s a bit older, your definition of higher and faster will be a lot closer to hers. When that day comes, go ahead… give it all you’ve got.

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39. Holding her upside down by the legs while she giggles and screams uncontrollably is great for your biceps. WARNING: She has no concept of muscle fatigue.

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40. She might ask you to buy her a pony on her birthday. Unless you live on a farm, do not buy her a pony on her birthday. It’s OK to rent one though.

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41. Take it easy on the presents for her birthday and Christmas. Instead, give her the gift of experiences you can share together.

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42. Let her know she can always come home. No matter what.

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43. Remember, just like a butterfly, she too will spread her wings and fly some day. Enjoy her caterpillar years.

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44. Write her a handwritten letter every year on her birthday. Give them to her when she goes off to college, becomes a mother herself, or when you think she needs them most.

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45. Learn to trust her. Gradually give her more freedom as she gets older. She will rise to the expectations you set for her.

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46. When in doubt, trust your heart. She already does.

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47. When your teenage daughter is upset, learning when to engage and when to back off will add years to YOUR life. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

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48. Ice cream covers over a multitude of sins. Know her favorite flavor.

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49. This day is coming soon. There’s nothing you can do to be ready for it. The sooner you accept this fact, the easier it will be.

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50. Today she’s walking down the driveway to get on the school bus. Tomorrow she’s going off to college. Don’t blink.

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Photo Credits can be found at the bottom of Michael’s original post.

Oh My Dear - Secrets You're Afraid Of...

If you have secrets you're afraid of or pain that you are burying - you should really listen to this guys funny yet deep story and then his song....

Oh My Dear - Tenth Avenue North

If you are looking for more help - you may want to check this short post out too:  Some Practical Advice When in Depression or Despair

I'm Gandalf and Magneto - Get Over It!

Awesome!

BTW - Did you know:   

Sean Connery turned down the role of Gandalf. He said in an interview that he "didn't understand it" and therefore didn't want to spend 18 months on the project.

Sean Connery has publicly stated he was offered a role in the Matrix (although many people beleive it was actually The Architect in The Matrix Reloaded). He turned down the role saying he couldn't understand the script. Years later, he said that he chose to do "the League of Extraordinary Gentleman" (despite not understanding the project) because he regretted turning both "the Matrix" and "Lord of the Rings" down.

Customer Service

A funny and telling definition of Customer service has been put this way – “Apologizing to total strangers for things over which you have no control”

As both a Customer and  a Customer Service “Representative” (or “CSR” )  I have had a few thoughts on this topic of Customer Service and how we treat people in this industry.

1) The first point I would like to make is this – as customers we have to distinguish our feelings for the corporation from our feelings toward the level entry worker you most often encounter (and on whom we often take out our wrath.)

As a customer I can understand the anger we can feel towards the corporation in question ( which ever that may be) , however it is a huge mistake to take out your anger against the corporation on the store associate who is lucky enough to get your complaint.

The average customer service worker – whether they be a cashier, a waitress, a drive through attendant, a telephone support worker  or a big box store floor worker (hereafter referred to as the CSR )   - is not responsible for corporate policy.

To boot -  They are often poorly paid and poorly trained – and that, again,  is the fault of the corporation.

Of  course -  they are responsible for their own personal conduct, their patience, their effort in helping you and their attitude in general…. But not the edicts passed down from “Head Office”.

When it comes to issues of price and policy – don’t shoot the messenger. 

Perhaps you should ask to talk to a manager (they are paid more and trained more and are expected to take on more responsibility). 

You may not know this but the average CSR is held to at least 3 “metrics” or standards.

a) They are expected to have great customer satisfaction .  This is usually measured by telephone, online or “fill out the card” surveys.   However the  customers  often fill out their surveys only when  they are angry – and the even then it is usually with things beyond the CSR’s control. 

Its also interesting to note that in a lot of businesses unless the CSR gets an “Extremely Satisfied” , they actually get docked points.

In other words when we customers fill something out as “Fairly” or “Somewhat” satisfied – the employee gets a big fat 0 , just the same as if you had said “Extremely Unsatisfied”.

Unfortunately . The systematic measuring of customer satisfaction of the CSR in the industry is extremely inaccurate and not true to life.

b)  Quality control – the CSR is also responsible for upholding company policy to a “t” .  This often handcuffs them in their attempt to please the customer – an example:

If you are on a phone, the common rule is that the CSR is not allowed to even let you talk to a supervisor until you have asked 3 times!  If they give you to a supervisor before then they will get docked in their Quality Control metric – this in turns affects their review and possibly their employment.

c) To add to these things, the average CSR is also expected to get things done fast or to increase sales or production . In other words, taking the time to make sure the customer is satisfied is often discouraged by the fact that their  “call time” is now too long ( or drive through time too slow , or sales too low etc…)

One other note – We all know how annoyed we get when the person on the other end of the phone support has a thick accent. But once again, are you really mad at them?  Are you mad that they took a well-paying job to provide for themselves and their family ?

No, the corporation again must be held accountable for their decisions and policies.

2)      The second principle I believe we need to remember when dealing with those in the customer service industry is simply this  - 

The universal law of “Love your neighbour” does not go out the window just because you are spending money.  The CSR should still be treated with courtesy and respect.  Believe it or not  - we are not better then them.

Christians -  re-read that last paragraph.

Now I am not out to vilify all corporations as some are great employers and they too have their challenges ( if the company doesn’t make any money, we all lose) .

Nor am I excusing the poor effort or bad attitudes put forth by some CSRs – as I said above - they are responsible for their own personal conduct, their patience, their effort in helping you and their attitude in general .

But lets just take a few moments to think before we are rude, angry or just plain disrespectful to that person in the customer service industry.

See MSN's Customer Service Hall of Shame ;)

http://money.ca.msn.com/savings-debt/gallery/customer-service-hall-of-shame?cp-documentid=30689754


My friend Joel had this to add on as a comment - I wholeheartedly agree!

Joel Boismier 

I can't seem to make the comment section work on your blog so I'll put my comments here:

Being in a customer service based industry I can definitely verify that the comments in the blog are correct and that we all encounter the crazy customers who make our lives difficult. But there is also the plus side of the job too when we have great customers who understand and work with you.

Typically the reason I encounter rude or irrate customers is when it comes to money. Money is such a driving force in our world that ones own money usually comes before anything else. The returns policy, bargining and the price of items are what draw customers into and drive them out of a store.

Honestly though, I am happier to work with and find work arounds for dilemmas that arise when a customer is level headed over a customer who is tearing a strip off of you. Respect, what I'm getting at, goes both ways!

Worldliness ( and its definition)

"The Biblical idea of the believer's separation from the World ( i.e. Society, Pop Culture etc in the negative sense*) is not to be isolated from it but rather to be insulated from it by the Holy Spirit and our pursuit of personal holiness."

Adapted from William MacDonald

(Please see below for further definition of the term "world" as used in the Bible and Koine Greek)

Jhn 17:13 "But now I come to You, and these things I speak in the world, that they may have My joy fulfilled in themselves. 

Jhn 17:14 "I have given them Your word; and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. 

Jhn 17:15 "I do not pray that You should take them out of the world, but that You should keep them from the evil one. 

Jhn 17:16 "They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. 

Jhn 17:17 "Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth. 

Jhn 17:18 "As You sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world.

Jhn 17:19 "And for their sakes I sanctify Myself, that they also may be sanctified by the truth.

Jhn 17:20 "I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will 

 believe in Me through their word;

Jhn 17:21 "that they all may be one, as You, Father, [are] in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me.    

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Further definition of the term "world" as used in the Bible and Koine Greek

Personal note:  I do not think it is wrong to use an appropriate "Pop Culture" reference in order to illustrate a Biblical point - Paul, himself, does this in his Mars Hill address when he quotes a famous poet off the day (Acts 17:28) 

*  Strong's:  Kosmos

1) an apt and harmonious arrangement or constitution, order, government

2) ornament, decoration, adornment, i.e. the arrangement of the stars, 'the heavenly hosts', as the ornament of the heavens. 1 Pet. 3:3

3) the world, the universe

4) the circle of the earth, the earth

5) the inhabitants of the earth, men, the human family

  As in:  Jhn 3:16 "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

Negatively:

6) the ungodly multitude; the whole mass of men alienated from God, and therefore hostile to the cause of Christ

7) world affairs, the aggregate of things earthly

a) the whole circle of earthly goods, endowments riches, advantages, pleasures, etc, which although hollow and frail and fleeting, stir desire, seduce from God and are obstacles to the cause of Christ

As in John 17 (above) and 

Jam 4:4 Adulterers and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.

 

Also note: 

There are several different words in the original New Testament  that are translated in the common version by this one English word, WORLD; the two principal ones are æon  and kosmos. Though both of these words are usually rendered world, yet they are really very distinct, and different in their meaning, and ought to have been rendered respectively age and world. 

 

Worldliness ¹

Definition: The quality of being worldly; a predominant passion for obtaining the good things of this life; covetousness; addictedness to gain and temporal enjoyments; worldly-mindedness. 

http://ardictionary.com/Worldliness/3885