Broken

I wanted to share a recent realization I’ve had about the Biblical teaching of the sinfulness of man and the struggles we have to deal with it.

Sin is an old word really, people think it religious and antiquated but what it really is – is what separates us from a Holy and Just God, a breaking of His law. Of course, we know that this same Holy and Just God is also a loving tender God who, at the ultimate cost, made a way to reunite with Him through the forgiveness available through Jesus’ substitutionary death on the cross.

When I worked for eBay a few years ago, one of the company’s main tenets was that “People are basically good”. I have to say, that all of us who worked there, religious or not, had quite a laugh every time this was quoted. You see, we had just finished a conversation with an irate member over a penny or two; we had just finished trying to resolve a conflict between two members who despised each other and called each other all types of names over a small transaction gone wrong; or we had just finished dealing with a death threat…or a suicide caller. What really made us laugh though is when we worked in the account security department and fought hard against constant fraud and theft of money and identity.  Even to the most optimistic of us, this “tenet” seemed naïve and hopelessly idealistic.

As C.S. Lewis concisely and accurately puts it:  "We are not merely imperfect creatures that need improvement: we are rebels that need lay down our arms".

So most of us will admit that we are less than perfect (although not many will admit they are rebellious to their Creator) . Others think too little of this, not understanding how pure and Holy our Creator is- others take it to extremes of self hatred.

I know and believe that we are indeed guilty before God – we need redemption. However, when I was younger, and even still today, I struggle with my sinful nature, I struggle with my own view of myself and worthiness or lack of it. I even struggle with self-hatred some times . I struggle with a type of guilt that I don’t believe is from God. In other words, I need to discern the difference between the CONVICTION of the Holy Spirit and the ACCUSATION of the devil ( Rev 12:10*)

 I used to think that self esteem ( in today’s connotation) was evil because it was in fact , just pride.

What I have come to realize is that admitting and acknowledging both the Biblical teaching and the seemingly obvious track record of our sinfulness is not just about feeling guilty. True guilt or conviction of the Holy Spirit will lead to forgiveness, redemption and then peace , love and joy. Its not just about how guilty we are, but how BROKEN we are. To me the term “broken” speaks not of self-hatred  but a literal inability to live a perfect life, a helplessness to help oursleves. It speaks of my hurts, my harms, my need for spiritual and emotional healing. When I acknowledge this, this utter insufficiency,  it is not suffocating hopelessness I feel but rather joy at the realization I don’t have to do this on my own – God is here. I don’t have to earn it, God has offered a way out – not just into heaven and eternity but also in this day to day grind that is life.  

And on the topic of self-esteem - what better esteem could I have than that the One who made me, loves me just as I am ( loves me so much in fact, that, like a parent, He will not leave me the way I am but discipline me and mold me into all I was meant to be)

I believe we need to exercise our free will and turn from the “sin” and towards God but also acknowledge our helplessness and surrender all to God (believing the Gospel)  so that He may make us what He wants us to be….

I realize now that self esteem is realizing you are loved by your Creator, made with purpose and self-respect. God has already forgiven you , if you will believe and receive it –now you need to forgive yourself and move on, comforted and victorious in His grace..

As one so eloquently put it, “We are unworthy, but not worthless”

 *

Rev 12:10

Then I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, "Now salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of His Christ have come, for the accuser of our brethren, who accused them before our God day and night, has been cast down.

The Touch of the Master's Hand

It was battered and scarred, And the auctioneer thought it hardly worth his while To waste his time on the old violin, but he held it up with a smile.

"What am I bid, good people", he cried, "Who starts the bidding for me?" "One dollar, one dollar, Do I hear two?" "Two dollars, who makes it three?" "Three dollars once, three dollars twice, going for three,"

But, No, From the room far back a gray bearded man Came forward and picked up the bow, Then wiping the dust from the old violin And tightening up the strings, He played a melody, pure and sweet As sweet as the angel sings.

The music ceased and the auctioneer With a voice that was quiet and low, Said "What now am I bid for this old violin?" As he held it aloft with its' bow.

"One thousand, one thousand, Do I hear two?" "Two thousand, Who makes it three?" "Three thousand once, three thousand twice, Going and gone", said he.

The audience cheered, But some of them cried, "We just don't understand." "What changed its' worth?" Swift came the reply. "The Touch of the Masters Hand."

And many a man with life out of tune All battered with bourbon and gin Is auctioned cheap to a thoughtless crowd Much like that old violin

A mess of pottage, a glass of wine, A game and he travels on. He is going once, he is going twice, He is going and almost gone.

But the Master comes, And the foolish crowd never can quite understand, The worth of a soul and the change that is wrought By the Touch of the Masters' Hand.

Myra Brooks Welch



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Addendum:

Dear_____ , that is a very interesting analogy but I have to disagree with it as far as a Biblical definition of sin – there is a definite individual fault and accountability on the part of the “sinner” that I don't really see in that analogy.

Rom 3:23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, Rom 3:24 being justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus,

Here the word for Sin is Greek -  Hamartano

1) to be without a share in

2) to miss the mark

3) to err, be mistaken

4) to miss or wander from the path of uprightness and honour, to do or go wrong

5) to wander from the law of God, violate God's law, sin

 “to miss the mark” has the connotation of an arrow that has failed to reach its target – our helplessness.

But there is also the definition  “to violate God’s law”  -  as 1 John says:

1Jo 3:4 Everyone who sins breaks the law; in fact, sin is lawlessness.

That is why I believe we need to exercise our free will and turn from the “sin” and towards God but also acknowledge our helplessness and surrender all to God (believing the Gospel)  so that He may make us what He wants us to be….

Another poem/hymn resonates with me now:

Just as I am, without one plea, But that Thy blood was shed for me, And that Thou bidst me come to Thee, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, and waiting not To rid my soul of one dark blot, To Thee whose blood can cleanse each spot, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, though tossed about With many a conflict, many a doubt, Fightings and fears within, without, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, poor, wretched, blind; Sight, riches, healing of the mind, Yea, all I need in Thee to find, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, Thou wilt receive, Wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve; Because Thy promise I believe, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, Thy love unknown Hath broken every barrier down; Now, to be Thine, yea, Thine alone, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Just as I am, of that free love The breadth, length, depth, and height to prove, Here for a season, then above, O Lamb of God, I come, I come!