In the conservative subculture of our day, there is an immense pressure on men to be macho (“showing aggressive pride in one's masculinity”). This indeed can be a knee-jerk reaction to the rest of society’s low view of manliness.
Manliness, as opposed to machismo, is a very good thing. Paul exhorts us in 1 Corinthians 16:13 to:
“Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.”
Note the phrase, “Be strong”. To be manly is often considered to be strong, not weak. And it is for this reason that so many men do not ask for help when they need it; they fear being perceived as weak by family, friends or society.
But what happens when we find ourselves in a place of tremendous weakness?
I was once a fully capable, independent man and proud of it. But when illness struck, I was forced to acknowledge that I was, in fact, weak. Not weak in character mind you – but weak in physical and mental power. I learned the hard way that God’s strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).
The question, however, is not whether we, as men, should be strong – but rather, where does our strength come from? King David, the poet-warrior, answered that question like this:
“I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth.” Psalm 121:1-2
And Jesus, the perfect man, told his disciples (a motley crew of self-sufficient men) that:
“Apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5
Nothing! We cannot work or play, we cannot fight or lead, without Jesus. This is sobering, humbling, and, I have found, joyous. There is a great freedom when we can lay down all our burdens and feelings of inadequacies at Jesus’ feet and trust him with it.
So, my fellow men (whether Christian or not), it is okay to be weak sometimes. We have to realize that weakness is not a dirty word for men. God says his strength is made perfect in it.
Therefore, it’s okay to talk about your struggles or reach out for help. This is not weakness in character, it is strength in humility.
